Knowledge from Soul Signature Tattoo

I occasionally like to drop in on Soul Signature's website to see what's going on at the shop and they usually have very entertaining blogs. Stopped in at their website this morning and Lucky posted a brief history of the polynesian tattoo - in the modern tattoo world. For myself, based on that information, I feel kind of priveleged to have received a tattoo at New Tribal Tattoo many years ago when it was open. It was very informative and really makes me respect the shop and the artists there even more than I already did before. Hey, what can I say, I'm a total fan of Soul Signature for both the art coming out and the entertainment factor while I'm there. I can honestly say, I've never been bored there.

If I didn't mention, Lucky is one of the rad artists that works there, and my male hair dresser wants to jump his bones. Don't get the wrong idea peeps, although I like to tease him and Jesico about their hot, monkey sex, he's not riding the bologna pony. Well, he says he's not.

I want another tattoo already. But then again, I always want another tattoo. If you're serious about getting a tattoo, you should really at least swing by the shop and check it out. Some of the stuff I've seen coming out of that shop is...crazy. Crazy good though. It always makes me wish that I had some artistic talent which is totally nil in my case. The best I can say is I have nice handwriting...I know, sad.

And no, I don't get any benefit from giving Soul Signature props. I just want to make sure that I do my part to help them continue to stay in business since I know I'll be back in there again some day soon.

First Cock Coozys, Now Willie Warmers

okay, I found this after I found the Cock Coozy. A Willie Warmer...really? A Willie Warmer. Do these people have literally nothing else to do with their time. Now this one, I really have to give you the description for:

"Description

***Free shipping to anywhere in the Continental US!!***

Au natural crocheted "Willie Warmer". Makes a fun and unusual gift....can actually be worn. Because.....there is nothing worse than a cold willie. I decided to do a line in more natural colors....pubes included. There are more "au natual" Willie Warmers to come.

Fits average size male....if you'd like specifics please convo me. I also make an "extra large" size Willie Warmer.

I can make these in any combination of colors, stripes...black/yellow, black/turquoise (as shown in photo), black/red, black/white. Multi colored, solid colors....the sky is the limit.Convo me and we'll discuss the possibilities."

I think I laughed harder and harder as I read each line. "pubes included" almost killed me. She has a line? A freakin' line of willie warmers. Are there that many people out there with cold ding-dings? What happened to say...long johns. Is your boto the sole appendage sticking out that you need something specific to keep it warm? I know, I know, I'm beating a dead horse here...but I can't help myself. Makes me feel better about myself I guess. Yes, there is someone out there more demented than me, and she's an entrepeneur.

Delectable Dude Thursday: New Moon Hottie

With all the hype of New Moon coming out tomorrow and the fact that I think Taylor Lautner is a total cutie, I decided to check out some of the stuff coming out on the movie. And bam, I found this week's hot hottieness. While I still think Taylor (Jacob Black) is cute and Rob Pattinson is attractive in a totally pale kind of way...Alex Meraz is SMOKIN' HOT! He plays Paul (one of the Quileute Werewolves in the movie.) I am officially now on Team Paul. Sorry Team Jacob, but Team Paul blows you way, way, way out of the water.

I feel a little lecherous at this moment cause the kid is like 10 years younger than me, but then I thought...SO FRICKEN' WHAT! He's hot, I have lust, so is life. Check him out ladies, in his shirtless glory in New Moon coming out 11/20. I'm just going to download pictures of him and drool over them. Anybody want to join Team Paul, you know he's the hottest one in the movie.

Xmas Must Have: Cock Coozy

That's right...I said it, cock coozy. Found this wonderful item on...you guessed it, etsy.com. I'm telling you the sell some of the best (and worst) shit I've ever seen on. Lemme fill you in on the description.

"Description

Wrap your favorite toy in warmth. This rainbow Cock Coozy measures 6 and 1/2 inches long and stretches to fit width (within reason). It's the perfect size for the standard vibrator and works best with plastic, glass, and wooden toys. It's a bit tougher to glide onto rubber toys.

Please contact me with any questions.

Hand wash cold with mild soap. Lay flat to dry.

Put a cover on your lover!"

I swear to God that I didn't make up this description. That was actually the description of the item. I totally swear. Not even i can make up something that fricken funny.

This is good for wood vibrators? Who the hell is using a wood vibrator? Imagine that then having to go the hospital and explain to the doctor how you got splinters in your ching? LMFAO.

Love, love, love etsy.com. Cock coozies definitely improve my mood.

I Want J-Lo's Hair

Not Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Love-Hewitt. My sister has been addicted to Ghost Whisperer lately. I mean literally, the DVR is filled Ghost Whisperer re-runs fry We TV...on a side note, what is the deal with her being in love with the Lifetime network channels. Damn, it's so van-driving housewife or old lady living with a million cats. I digress as usual. All I can say is that I love J Love's hair. I mean damn...how often do you see a hot, antique-owner that sees ghosts and helps them cross over to the light. Not to mention, sister friend wears stiletto platforms everyday. Who the hell runs a store, standing up all day in stiletto platforms. I guess if you are at that level of hotness, you can. Bitch. Yeah, I only said that because I'm jealous and she's perfect.

I know, I haven't blogged in a while. But, life does interfere with art...and what else can I describe my writing as...art? drivel? Well, love it or hate it, it's me. If you don't like it, you're only one click away from ignorance. LoL.

I'm in that kind of mood today. PMS is bliss.